Hermit as Love Advice (Upright & Reversed) Tarot Card Meaning

Hermit is the card of self-reflection, solitude, introspection, and wisdom. An old man stands alone at the top of a peak, holding a lantern in one hand and his staff in the other. The Hermit shows that being alone is a necessary part of the cycle of life and relationships, because it connects us with our deeper wisdom and true self. 

The Hermit is not a traditional “love” card. It’s easy to feel scared when the Hermit comes up in a love reading. Does it mean that someone doesn’t want to be with you? Remember that there are positives and negatives to be found in every card. In love readings, the Hermit asks us to get in touch with and serve our Wise Self. In order to love others, we must first love ourselves. 

Upright Hermit as Love Advice

If you are asking about love advice, and you draw the Hermit, that means that you are advised to give the person you are interested in some space. They are currently a hermit, meaning they are focused solely on themselves and their own success. If you give them space, show them appreciation, and go out of your way to help them when they need it, you can inch closer to them over time. If you are fine with playing the long game, then you still have a chance with this person.

For love, the Hermit as advice means that you should respect the person you are interested in and whatever it is they are focused on. If you try to break boundaries and make a move on them, they will not take it kindly. They are very serious about their endeavors, and if you force yourself between that, then you will completely ruin your chances. Respect and boundaries go a long way in someone’s love for you.

For singles, the Hermit as love advice means that you have secluded yourself from the dating world. You are unapproachable, and something has taken your time away from meeting potential partners. You have missed a lot of opportunities because of your focus on yourself, however there are many opportunities awaiting you in the future. As a single, you should have hope for the future if you recognize where you put your attention.

For new and potential relationships, the Hermit as love advice means that you have distance between each other. The relationship has not started off close-knit which could cause issues in the future. You want to be close to your partner, and not be a hermit. The relationship nevertheless has great potential because you were brought together for a reason.

For existing relationships, the Hermit as advice means that they see you as separate from them. You both have your own goals and thoughts about life. The relationship started amazingly, but you have started to get too used to each other being around. You now are starting to live life as if you were back before you met them. The best advice is to rekindle the initial passion that brought you together.

If you are asking about reconciliation with an ex, the Hermit as love advice shows that reconciliation is not possible. Moving on is the best option. To feel the least amount of pain, you should surround yourself with the goals that distracted you in the first place when you were still with the person. Before you know it, you will be back on the grind of life without thinking about your ex.

Reversed Hermit as Love Advice

If you are asking about love advice, and you draw the Hermit reversed, that means that you are advised to move closer to the people you have. You are most probably hurting from loneliness and isolation, and unlike upright Hermit, this isolation is not healthy for you. You need people to help you through this rut in your life, including the special person you’re thinking about.

For love, the Hermit reversed as advice means that you should reevaluate how happy you are with your life. If you want a partner, then make the necessary changes to your life in order to have one. Sitting in sadness is the worst thing you can do. It’s hard to get up when you’re down, but it must be done for the best future for yourself.

For singles, the Hermit reversed as love advice means that you have taken a path in life of loneliness. You want and need someone to love and care for, and you need them to love and care for you. Reversed Hermit indicates that being single is not the right thing for you. You may think you are independent, but your reading says otherwise. 

For new and potential relationships, the Hermit reversed as love advice means that you are not connecting with your partner as you should. You both have your own goals, and once the relationship began, you both received better insight into how each other’s daily life goes. Your lives are wildly different, and this causes distance between you two. Love advice for this situation is to be honest with each other and attempt to find similarities in your goals.

For existing relationships, the Hermit reversed as advice means that the relationship is beginning to fall apart because of isolation. You have both begun to isolate from each other. Your inner hermits have taken over after being in a relationship for so long, and you begin to want to be single again. Advice for this is to trust your feelings and follow them, whether it is to end or attempt to continue the separated relationship.

If you are asking about reconciliation with an ex, the Hermit reversed as love advice shows that it is better to move on and look for someone new. Your ex hurts from the breakup, and they are not getting over it anytime soon. Reconciliation would be a dangerous thing for both parties, and it would most likely end worse than last time. Advice for this is to distract yourself with things you love and attempt to move on from your ex.

Conclusion

For relationships and feelings, Hermit reveals our inner wisdom and the strength of our bond with our Self. In order to love others, we must first love ourselves. It shows that codependency is not love. If we are not careful, closeness can become toxic suffocation. The space for individual growth is necessary for a healthy relationship. If you lean into the wisdom of the Hermit, your relationships will become stronger, more confident, and more fulfilled.

If you find yourself needing further clarity in your relationship matters that go beyond reading for yourself, Sibyl offers unlimited tarot readings on love & relationships, as a neutral and objective third party.