Hermit as Sex & Intimacy (Upright & Reversed) Tarot Card Meaning

Hermit is the card of self-reflection, solitude, introspection, and wisdom. An old man stands alone at the top of a peak, holding a lantern in one hand and his staff in the other. The Hermit shows that being alone is a necessary part of the cycle of life and relationships, because it connects us with our deeper wisdom and true self. 

The Hermit is not a traditional “love” card. It’s easy to feel scared when the Hermit comes up in a love reading. Does it mean that someone doesn’t want to be with you? Remember that there are positives and negatives to be found in every card. In love readings, the Hermit asks us to get in touch with and serve our Wise Self. In order to love others, we must first love ourselves. 

Upright Hermit as Sex & Intimacy

If you are asking about sex or intimacy and you draw the Hermit, it suggests that your connection is introspective, emotionally reserved, or taking space to reflect. One or both people may be turning inward, focusing on personal healing rather than physical closeness. This card highlights emotional distance—not out of rejection, but out of a need for clarity and self-understanding.

The Hermit as a message about sex and intimacy reveals an experience that feels private, emotionally deep, and more about inner growth than physical action. Intimacy may be happening on a spiritual or emotional level before anything physical develops. It’s a moment of slowing down and tuning in rather than acting on immediate desire.

If you are wondering about someone’s sexual feelings towards you, and you draw the Hermit, it means they are thinking about you deeply but may be withdrawn or not ready to act. Their attraction is thoughtful and sincere, but they may need solitude to process what they feel. This person is not emotionally checked out—they’re just moving at their own internal pace.

The Hermit as someone’s sexual attraction and desire towards you suggests they feel connected on a soul level, but may need time alone to process their feelings. They could be pulled toward you quietly, in a way that feels sacred or contemplative rather than passionate and impulsive. This is the kind of energy that values meaning over urgency.

If you’re asking about a one-night stand or casual intimacy, the Hermit suggests it is unlikely to happen—or if it does, it may feel emotionally distant or unsatisfying. The focus is not on physical connection, but rather on introspection and solitude. Even if intimacy happens, it might not bring the closeness or excitement you’re looking for.

If you’re wondering whether this connection can deepen sexually and emotionally, the Hermit shows that it can, but only after time, healing, and honest self-reflection. Patience is key—emotional maturity needs to lead the way before intimacy can truly grow. When both people are ready and aligned, the bond can become something deeply soulful.

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Reversed Hermit as Sex & Intimacy

If you are asking about sex or intimacy and you draw the Hermit reversed, it suggests that your connection is emotionally disconnected, lonely, or stuck in avoidance. Someone may be retreating not to reflect—but to escape vulnerability or hide emotional pain. This creates a dynamic where intimacy feels blocked or unavailable.

The Hermit reversed as a message about sex and intimacy reveals an experience that feels isolating, imbalanced, or blocked by fear of vulnerability. There’s a desire for closeness, but it’s being shut down by emotional distance or unspoken fears. Intimacy may feel unreachable because someone isn’t emotionally present or open.

If you are wondering about someone’s sexual feelings towards you, and you draw the Hermit reversed, it means they are avoiding their feelings or unsure how to express desire. They might feel confused or overwhelmed by what they feel and choose to pull away instead of moving closer. This emotional withdrawal can create misunderstandings or silence between you.

The Hermit reversed as someone’s sexual attraction and desire towards you suggests they may feel lonely or disconnected but aren’t sure how to reach out. They want connection but don’t know how to initiate it, possibly due to past hurt or fear of rejection. This card often points to someone who needs healing before they can truly engage.

If you’re asking about a one-night stand or casual intimacy, the Hermit reversed suggests it will be unfulfilling or driven by loneliness rather than true desire. It could feel hollow, rushed, or emotionally confusing afterward. This experience may leave one or both people feeling more disconnected than before.

If you’re wondering whether this connection can deepen sexually and emotionally, the Hermit reversed shows that emotional walls must come down before real intimacy can happen. Avoidance, silence, or emotional withholding will only delay meaningful closeness. Real growth starts when both people are willing to open up and truly see each other.

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Conclusion

For relationships and feelings, Hermit reveals our inner wisdom and the strength of our bond with our Self. In order to love others, we must first love ourselves. It shows that codependency is not love. If we are not careful, closeness can become toxic suffocation. The space for individual growth is necessary for a healthy relationship. If you lean into the wisdom of the Hermit, your relationships will become stronger, more confident, and more fulfilled.

If you find yourself needing further clarity in your relationship matters that go beyond reading for yourself, Sibyl offers unlimited tarot readings on love & relationships, as a neutral and objective third party.