Four of Cups as Reconciliation (Upright & Reversed) Tarot Card Meaning

The Four of Cups is the card of apathy, contemplation, disconnection, indifference, and boredom. This card shows a young man deep in reflection and meditation. He is so engrossed in his own thoughts that he doesn’t notice an outstretched arm offering him a cup. Another three cups lie at his feet, but he does not notice them either.   

The Four of Cups reminds us that gratitude is a critical element to every successful relationship. Do not be so self-absorbed that you do not see the wonderful opportunities for happiness around you. Do not be so focused on what you do not have that you overlook what you already have. The Four of Cups is a reminder and a warning to be grateful for what we have. 

Upright Four of Cups as Reconciliation

If you are asking about how your ex feels about reconciling with you, and you draw the Four of Cups, it means that your ex is stuck in their head. They are feeling withdrawn from the world, and they are running away from their feelings. They would rather do anything else than feel their emotions. While it can be a good thing to withdraw into yourself, it’s only good if it’s done with the intent to meditate and self-reflect. In this case, your ex is using it as an easy way to escape from their feelings, which causes a problem.

Four of Cups as reconciliation is a sign of a loss of direction. Your ex is tired and doesn’t know where they can turn. They have no direction to follow, and this brings them down. They know that something is missing from their lives, but they can’t quite put their finger on what it is. They lack passion and spark, and they are desperately trying to figure out how to relight the spark. 

When your ex thinks about reconciliation with you, they feel afraid. They don’t want to feel love — they don’t want to feel anything. They are too stuck in their own mind that they are blind to the things in front of them, including you. Your relationship wasn’t a bad one, and it definitely isn’t your fault that your ex is feeling this way. They are having a hard time focusing on anything, especially the positive things in life. 

If you’ve recently split up, Four of Cups means that your ex is too afraid to confront what they are feeling. The only person they can think of right now is themselves, and not in a good way. They are self-absorbed, and they cannot see your value. You don’t deserve that. They are being selfish right now. Reconciliation is definitely not on their mind right now, and it won’t be until they can shift their mindset. 

If you’ve been in separation for a while, Four of Cups means that they are still stuck. They are still preoccupied with running away from their feelings, and there isn’t anything you can do to help. Don’t expect reconciliation, and don’t stick around either. They refuse to see what is ahead of them, and until they can confront their feelings, reconciliation is not happening.

If the two of you are still considering whether or not you should break up, Four of Cups means that you and your partner definitely need to talk to each other right now. Try talking to your partner about how they’re feeling, and get them to open up. However, don’t be too hard on yourself if you can’t get them to talk. After all, this is an internal problem, and your partner will ultimately be the one who can fix their problems. Beware though, because this card can also be a sign of your partner being afraid to commit to you. Remember, you deserve someone who can appreciate you for who you are. You deserve someone who is willing to stick with you through thick and thin.

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Reversed Four of Cups as Reconciliation

If you are asking about how your ex feels about reconciling with you, and you draw the Four of Cups reversed, it means that they are ready to move on to better things. They were very withdrawn and stuck in their heads, but now, they’ve finally come out of that. They’ve found direction, and they are beginning to look toward the future. They see that their future has a lot of promise, and it makes them feel excited.

Four of Cups reversed as reconciliation is a sign of appreciation. Their eyes are finally open to the good things around them, and they couldn’t be more grateful. They recognize the blessings around them, and it is making them feel emotional. They aren’t afraid to admit that they are still missing a lot of things in their life. They do not have everything. However, it almost feels like it because of all the amazing things and people that surround them.

When your ex thinks about reconciliation with you, they feel satisfied. Your ex has taken a lot of time to reflect and think about your relationship. Now, they don’t feel negatively towards you. In fact, they are grateful for the things they learned during your relationship. Reconciliation is unlikely, because they are ready to let go of the past and move on to the future. Reconciliation is only possible if your ex sees you in their future. But, either way, your ex was happy to grow with you. They are appreciative of your relationship and everything you’ve taught them. The best you can do right now is just be happy that they are finally letting go and moving on to better things.

If you’ve recently split up, Four of Cups reversed means that your ex is still looking towards the future. They are grateful and appreciative of you, but it’s also possible that they feel like your time together has already passed. Reconciliation is a big “maybe.” Don’t wait for this person. You should just move on with your life, just like your ex. 

If you’ve been in separation for a while, Four of Cups reversed means that your ex has probably decided that they want to move on from the past and leave everything behind, including your relationship. Don’t be sad. You were a very transformative part of your ex’s life. Be happy for them, and also start moving on. Reflect on your relationship and all of its good and bad, and ultimately leave it behind. It’s time for both of you to move on to better things!

If the two of you are still considering whether or not you should break up, Four of Cups reversed means that your partner has finally realized their selfishness. They were taking you for granted and they see that now. They are ready to take a step in the right direction and are excited because they can definitely see you in their future. You’ve got great things coming. Your relationship hasn’t been easy, but feel rest assured and know that the best is yet to come.

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Conclusion

For relationships and reconciliation, the Four of Cups represents withdrawal and contemplation. This card is inherently philosophical in nature. It is normal for us to want more than we already have, but sometimes, we need to appreciate what is already in front of us. This is critical for any successful relationship. 

If you find yourself needing further clarity in your relationship matters that go beyond reading for yourself, Sibyl offers unlimited tarot readings on love & relationships, as a neutral and objective third party.