The Four of Pentacles is the card of insecurity, jealousy, possessiveness, stinginess, boundaries, and guardedness. This card depicts a man clutching many pentacles close to his body. His arms and feet are locked defensively in a closed stance. He acts as if he believes that someone is going to rob him at any second. He is guarded and does not trust others.
The Four of Pentacles reminds us that boundaries are important to healthy relationships, but sometimes insecurity can take our boundaries too far. When we have our guard up to the point of paranoia and jealousy, we deprive ourselves of the ability to give and receive love and emotional support. The Four of Pentacles is a reminder that love should be freely given and that possessiveness can destroy relationships.
If you are asking about how your ex feels about reconciling with you, and you draw the Four of Pentacles, it means your ex definitely wants you back, but maybe for unhealthy reasons. Their reasons for wanting to ‘reconcile’ might be over jealousy, clinginess, and insecurity. These tendencies can harm your relationship along the way. Your ex isn’t interested in healing the relationship or resolving issues, they want to “own” you. If controlling behavior and possessiveness was an issue before, this is not a good sign.
Four of Pentacles as reconciliation is a sign of an unhealthy relationship ridden by possessiveness, jealousy, and controlling behavior. Unless you both heal your insecurities, this relationship could be toxic. Work on your shadow selves and focus on healing the relationship.
Let go of old baggage. One or both of you could be overly needy. Make sure you’re together not because you feel the need to “own” each other, but so you can grow together.
When your ex thinks about reconciliation with you, they feel motivated by clinginess, neediness, or possessiveness. Your ex is paranoid about you moving onto somebody else. They are feeling insecure about their position in your life. If you want to reconcile with this person you may be happy to hear they want you back. However, make sure that they heal their possessive, jealous, or controlling tendencies first. You deserve to be in a healthy relationship.
If you’ve recently split up, Four of Pentacles means your ex is devastated and they wish the breakup never happened. They are obsessively thinking of ways to get back with you. Their attachment toward you is unhealthy, which could lead to possessiveness and jealousy. While your ex may be open to reconciling, make sure they have done their shadow work first. Their need to own you can make any attempts at reconciliation turn toxic.
If you’ve been in separation for a while, Four of Pentacles means they are still depressed about losing you. They still carry a lot of baggage from your relationship. Memories of you might even depress them. Your ex sees you as “the one who got away” and they still cling onto the memory of you. If your ex is single, they’re likely to be open to reconciling with you. But if they were jealous, possessive, and controlling in the past, they haven’t changed.
If the two of you are still considering whether or not you should break up, Four of Pentacles means your partner does not want this relationship to end. However, the dynamics in your relationship are unhealthy. One of you is too clingy and needy, the other feels suffocated. You both love each other, but the relationship is unhealthy. One or both of you need to do shadow work. Insecurities, possessiveness, jealousy, and need for control could be a factor. You need to work together on building trust and loving each other in a more healthy way.
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If you are asking about how your ex feels about reconciling with you, and you draw the Four of Pentacles reversed, it means your ex has let go of past hurts. They may believe that “if you love them, set them free”. Your person has no hard feelings against you. They might be open to reconciliation, but they’re still healing. Giving this person some time and space might help. If you wish to reconnect, starting off as friends first might help.
Four of Pentacles reversed as reconciliation is a sign of approaching this relationship with a “go with the flow” attitude. While they want to make it work this time, they’re taking it show and not forcing anything. This is a relationship where forgiving and apologizing has been done. The two of you are ready to let go of old baggage and move onto a new chapter in your lives. You’re not attached to the outcome. If it works, great. If it doesn’t, you can just be friends.
When your ex thinks about reconciliation with you, they feel unattached to any particular outcome. They have released expectations of making a relationship work out with you. Your ex harbors no bad feelings against you, they simply have let go. If you do want a reconciliation with them, you will likely need to be the one to initiate it.
If you’ve recently split up, Four of Pentacles reversed means that your ex has let go of hope that you can work things out already. They feel like they’ve lost some stability since their breakup with you. Your person feels they’ve lost a sense of “being home”, the routines they had, and just being with you. But they have come to terms that you’re incompatible, so they’ve let go. They are not particularly keen on a reconciliation.
If you’ve been in separation for a while, Four of Pentacles reversed means your ex has let you go and moved on. They have released any attachment they had from you. Your person has healed from the relationship and carries no baggage from it. They might be open to being friends with you. If they agree to reconcile, they’re unattached to any particular outcome. They’re expecting a fresh new start and for things to heal between the two of you. If the attempt at reconciliation doesn’t work out, they won’t be too disappointed.
If the two of you are still considering whether or not you should break up, Four of Pentacles reversed means one or both of you understand the issues that need to be addressed. You’re testing out whether these issues can be resolved or if they’ll become “irreconcilable differences.” Although you’re not attached to the outcome, both of you want to make it work. You’re both working on releasing emotional blockers. If possessiveness or controlling behavior was an issue before, both parties are working to heal. Both of you are realistic and grounded in your approach to this relationship.
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For relationships and reconciliation, the Four of Pentacles represents insecurity and jealousy. While it’s natural to want to be your partner’s special person, it can be counterproductive to take possessiveness too far. This can be a detriment and burden to the relationship. If you find yourself having these feelings, ask yourself where it is coming from and if it is based in reality.
If you find yourself needing further clarity in your relationship matters that go beyond reading for yourself, Sibyl offers unlimited tarot readings on love & relationships, as a neutral and objective third party.