Four of Swords as Reconciliation (Upright & Reversed) Tarot Card Meaning

The Four of Swords is the card of rest, relaxation, self-protection, peace, and rejuvenation. This card shows a knight lying down horizontally on a tomb. He is resting with his eyes closed. His hands are held in a prayer position, and he lies underneath a stained glass window, likely in a church. This indicates that he is thinking deeply about spiritual matters.

The Four of Swords reminds us that while there are times where we need to go, go, go, there are also times where we need to press the pause button. Relaxation and self-care are important factors for any successful relationship. The Four of Swords reminds us to take care of ourselves. We can’t give to others what we don’t have.

Upright Four of Swords as Reconciliation

If you are asking about how your ex feels about reconciling with you, and you draw the Four of Swords, it means they feel withdrawn. They are not ready for a second try at making your relationship work. Your person is trying to reflect and heal from your breakup. They are still mentally exhausted from what happened, and they need to breathe.

Four of Swords as reconciliation is a sign of neither of you really being ready to give the relationship another try. Relationships require work from both sides. But, reconciling a failed relationship takes even more work. Both parties need to have healed. Take some alone time to reflect on what you want out of relationships until you are both ready.

When your ex thinks about reconciliation with you, they feel drained. They are not ready to re-embark in a relationship. Especially not with an ex from the past, because they know that reconciliations can be emotionally taxing. Give your ex some time to recuperate and regroup. They might not feel like talking about relationships and dating. Your ex may want to be left alone right now. 

If you’ve recently split up, Four of Swords means your ex is trying their best to heal from the situation. They’re probably a little shell-shocked over what happened. While not entirely closed off to the idea of reconciliation, they are not ready at the moment. They would appreciate being given time to recuperate. Your ex is not going out to get into rebound relationships or random hookups. They’re opting to keep to themselves, introspect, and contemplate.

If you’ve been in separation for a while, Four of Swords means they’ve mentally separated from you. They avoid revisiting their past with you as it exhausts them mentally. Memories of past disagreements return from time to time, but they don’t dwell on it. Your ex may have become more reserved in dating as a result of your breakup. They are still trying to recover from the heartbreak of your relationship. However, they are actively trying to heal as they’re looking to move on.

If the two of you are still considering whether or not you should break up, Four of Swords means you just need to spend a few days or weeks apart. Both of you need some time alone and apart from each other. You need to remember who you are and what you want. Do you really have the same goals and dreams? Or have one or both of you gotten lost in each other? One of you may believe the other has become too clingy. You both need some space to breathe.

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Reversed Four of Swords as Reconciliation

If you are asking about how your ex feels about reconciling with you, and you draw the Four of Swords reversed, it means they have taken their time to heal and are feeling better as a result. Your ex is ready to get out there again. If you have been giving them space and time alone, they are almost ready to see you again. Their passion for love and life has reignited. While your ex may not be fully healed, they are at least in a better headspace.

Four of Swords reversed as reconciliation is a sign of a healing relationship. This is an opportunity for both of you to heal each other and the relationship itself. Work on shifting any unhealthy dynamics into something more accommodating for both parties. Both of you have done your shadow work. Both of you have meditated on how to heal and improve the relationship. This is a relationship where you function well as a unit but give each other space. There is no codependency, neediness, or clinginess.

When your ex thinks about reconciliation with you, they feel grateful that you gave them space and time to heal. Their healing process was very beneficial to them. They feel they learned a lot about themselves and about relationships. Your ex has gained a lot of perspective since then. They have since recuperated and re-energized from the emotionally draining breakup with you. Your ex is now ready to  potentially start over.

If you’ve recently split up, Four of Swords reversed means they’re rushing their healing process. Your ex needs to heal, but they either lack the self-awareness to recuperate or they’re in denial. Instead of taking some time off dating, they could be out and about looking for rebounds. Their way of dealing with the breakup is unhealthy. They’re rushing through what should be a process of healing. Your ex is not taking time to feel their feelings or think their thoughts through.

If you’ve been in separation for a while, Four of Swords reversed means they’ve come to terms with the difficulties you had as a couple. They’ve learned all the lessons that they needed to learn from your time together. Your ex has become enlightened about the nature of relationships in general. They likely had an epiphany. Your person is finally ready and excited to make a move toward reconciliation. Take it slow if you want to heal the relationship.

If the two of you are still considering whether or not you should break up, Four of Swords reversed means they are more optimistic about the future now. A serious and very frank conversation about the direction of this relationship needs to be had. With mutual understanding, your partner would be open to making necessary changes. Their main focus at the moment is to heal and reignite the relationship. They are willing to make the effort working things out.

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Conclusion

For relationships and reconciliation, the Four of Swords represents rest and relaxation. Sometimes, things can get intense, and we need a timeout. Relaxation and self-care are important to any successful relationship. Take care of yourself, and make sure that you are giving to yourself. We can’t give to others what we don’t have ourselves. 

If you find yourself needing further clarity in your relationship matters that go beyond reading for yourself, Sibyl offers unlimited tarot readings on love & relationships, as a neutral and objective third party.