The Tower is the card of transformative change, revelation, and awakening. The Tower sits on top of a jagged mountain. Lightning strikes, burning the Tower down. Two people leap from the windows, headfirst. This is a scene of chaos and destruction.
The Tower reminds us that sudden and massive change is a part of life. Change is here to throw our lives into upheaval, and its chaos will shake us to our very core. That being said, it is necessary to our growth, and we cannot fight it. We often cannot see it at the time, but looking back, these are the moments that make us.
If you are asking about how someone feels about you, and you draw the Tower, it means that this person feels that you’ve fundamentally transformed their life and outlook. In a new relationship, you could have given them a new perspective on life. After a breakup, you could have reshaped their view on what they’re looking for in a relationship. For better or worse, transformational change is a part of life.
The Tower is also a sign of intense feelings that have not yet been let out of the box. Fundamental change in your relationship is coming. You can choose whether to ignore it–at your own peril–or to fully embrace it. While your relationship may be permanently changed, it can be for the better. For example, if you use these feelings to communicate your needs honestly, it can change the relationship in a positive and instructive way. On the other hand, if your relationship does end, it may be for the best. When one door closes, another opens.
For singles and those embarking on new relationships, the Tower means that this person feels that you’ve changed their view on life. Meeting you was unexpected, and the new ideas you’ve brought into their life are unexpected as well. Whether or not this relationship has the roots to become long-term remains to be seen, but it’s off to a promising start. The Tower can also be taken as a phallic symbol. If so, this person feels immense sexual attraction and desire for you.
For existing relationships, the Tower indicates that this person harbors explosive feelings for you underneath the surface. Whether good or bad, you can rest assured that change is coming in the relationship. Whatever your partner reveals to you will change your relationship in a permanent way. Listen to yourself and your intuition. It’s likely that you already have a hint of what might be coming.
If you are asking about an old flame or an ex’s feelings about you, the Tower indicates that your ex feels fundamentally changed by your relationship. Its ending has caused your ex to question themselves and what they want in life. Is reconciliation possible? It is certainly possible. However, the Tower does not necessarily indicate that they want to get back together with you–just that they are in the middle of figuring things out for themselves right now.
In the context of whether or not a relationship is headed for commitment, engagement, or marriage, the Tower as feelings signifies that great changes are coming. Your relationship is going to fundamentally change. If your relationship is built on a strong foundation, this could mean the coming of the next chapter. If your relationship already shows signs of crumbling, the need for further commitment will only hasten its collapse. The Tower often brings painful truth and change. Though it may hurt at first, it is better to know sooner than later.
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When the Tower is reversed, it means that this person feels resistant to coming change. They are willing to go neither forward nor backward. They would prefer not to move at all, because they are scared of change. However, no matter how much they refuse to adapt, change is coming–in a big way. You can’t change how this person reacts, but you can choose how you will react to change. Choose adaptability, flexibility, and grace.
The Tower reversed is also a sign of building resentment. Have there been times in the relationship where you’ve let small things go too many times? Over time, if we do not communicate with one another, these small things build up into big resentments. This may be the case with your partner as well. The Tower reversed is a warning, telling you that you need to communicate. It can also signal that you might want to consider leaving, if this relationship is truly not working out.
For singles and those in new relationships, the Tower reversed is a sign of feeling unwilling to make a big change right now. Though you may be transformative in your intensity, this person is scared and not currently receptive. Life is funny, and it has a way of bringing change into our lives, whether we like it or not. That being said, do you want a partner who is unwilling to be flexible and adapt with the times?
For those in committed relationships, the Tower reversed is a sign of feeling resentful and resistant to change. Your partner could be keeping quiet over things they dislike, but are scared to bring up to you. Though it may not be a big deal as a one-off, over time, these small things may turn into larger issues. If you see any problems in your relationship, now is the time to address these problems headon. Though it may be uncomfortable, it will prevent bigger problems down the line. That being said, it takes two to tango, so you’ll both need to be on the same page.
If you are asking about an ex’s feelings about you, the Tower reversed means that they feel that they are going through a period of significant change and upheaval. They are not very happy about this type of disruptive change. The end of the relationship has taken a toll on them. They feel that they are caught in midair, between a rock and a hard place. As much as they would like to reverse how things went, they cannot. Now that Pandora’s box has been opened, reconciliation seems like a difficult prospect.
In the context of whether or not a relationship is headed for commitment, engagement, or marriage, the Tower reversed indicates a resistance to change. This person feels that change is being forced upon them unwillingly. This person does not want to say “yes” to monumental change. Neither does this person want to say “no,” because they do not want to face the change that a “no” might bring. Instead, they would rather bury their head in the sand and hope it goes away. Until this person can embrace change with honesty, you will continue to get non-answers.
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For relationships and feelings, the Tower reveals the power of rapid, transformative change. With every ending comes a new beginning. No matter how much we resist change, it will come–so it is better to embrace it. Although you may go through extremely trying times, know that they will pass and eventually bring something better.
If you find yourself needing further clarity in your relationship matters that go beyond reading for yourself, Sibyl offers unlimited tarot readings on love & relationships, as a neutral and objective third party.